Today, I did go and drive a tank! And it was BWILLIANT! Seriously, I have been excited about this for some time, it just seemed so different, but boy I actually enjoyed it more than I was expecting - I'm still buzzing. Even though it's from the wrong Armed Service, I've had the theme of Top Gun going through my head all day.
Anyways, this challenge took place in Leicestershire at a place called Armourgeddon. They offer all sorts of tank driving experiences, the taster session - which I did, Dads and Lads experiences and Tank Paintballing games. As a completely non-driver, never having even had a driving lesson in my life, I thought the taster session might be my best bet.
I arrived, signed in, signed my life away - owned up to not being able to drive anything, and then got kitted up. You're given overalls as tanks as dirty vehicles, and a helmet as there's plenty of opportunity for bashing your head in a confined place.
We got introduced to our tank, for afficianados, I'm afraid I can't remember the accurate technical name of this armoured vehicle, I just remember her nickname was Marilyn. And it was 17 tonnes! We all climbed in - three drivers, a passenger - a little'un and two instructors. Bloody hell it was cramped. I was so appreciative that I am fairly tiny, made things much easier. After general elf n safety stuff it was decided that me, as the complete non driver, I'd go first. So, crawling on hands on knees to the front of the tank, straight through a harness, climb on a seat, poke my head up through the opening and get kitted up, goggles, helmet and headpiece for communication.
So, all set to go. I'm told about gears, acceleration, and how to steer right, left and straight ahead using two levers, one pedal and one wee wheel which shows revs. As a complete non-driver I completely understand, don't I??? HELL NO. I did ask him to repeat everything and then I was off. Apparently, and I only found this out later, Stewart was SOOOO impressed as he looked at me and thought, Crikey, she's going for it, big time! Took him only a short while to realise this actually meant I was pretty out of control. But to think that for just a short period he was proud of me for going for it.....
I WAS enjoying myself. However, it became apparent, quickly, I was enjoying myself too much. I was the only driver out of the three to have control briefly taken away from me! Apparently, I was going too fast, over bumpy areas, and they had concerns that a child 'passenger' was apparently getting tossed around in the back because of my gung-ho attitude. So I had to be calmed down!!!! That's absolutely fair enough to be honest. I'm really not used to being in charge of vehicles and probably was getting carried away. But I LOVED it!!! I was just quite happy that I managed to drive around a herd of cows that were there, sort of forgot there was a small child in the back - sorry Milly. The cows? They had no idea whatsoever of the imminent danger they were in with me being in charge of a vehicle. They're not going to moo-ve (see what I did there?) quickly, and I didn't have much cats chance in hell of avoiding them, but I did, thankfully.
Anway, you did one lap while driving with your head 'out' and then did one lap with the hatch closed and viewing through a periscope. Was exceedingly claustrophic, seriously claustrophobic, but you just got to concentrate on what you're doing. You have absolutely no idea, nobody would but the picture below, is of a tank being driven, by me! Using a periscope!
This second lap for me was actually more stressful as I couldn't hardly see anything but by now I had realised I needed to concentrate a bit more and do my best. I kind of was beginning to get the hang of it by now and I hadn't actually taken out any cows, or permanently traumatised small children, I don't think....
It came time to relinquish controls and pass on to the other two drivers. From now on I'd be perched up top. Quite frankly I was glad, these things are bloody hot. And to think this was just the UK , there weren't many of us in the tank and it wasn't for long. It didn't take too much imagination to consider how it could actually feel if this was for real, under proper battle conditions, actually, didn't bear thinking about. I just considered this as a bonkers experience, and one which I'm really glad I had.
Seriously loved this today, it was a challenge. Just as I've come realise over the last 12 months that I shouldn't be allowed near kitchens, I also accept I probably shouldn't be in charge of any form of transport either, tho I felt more in control here and this was so bloody enjoyable! Who knew, that at the age of 50, I'd be able to say 'I've driven a freaking tank'!
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